I am a single professional man, 34, who has "chosen" to be celibate for the majority of my adult life.  My story is similar to others I’ve seen posted here: I am shy, avoid social situations, and suffer from low self-esteem.  I remained a virgin until my early twenties despite strong sexual urges and an attraction to the opposite sex.

I went through a period of "normal" dating and sexual activity during my late twenties, but returned to celibacy over the last six years.  I’ve found a low interest in sex to be a major problem now.  I’ve even gone as far as a physical exam and laboratory testing to determine a cause, but haven’t found it to be a medical problem.  Low self-esteem has also returned as a problem for me.  I had joined a gym in my twenties as a chance to socialize and to improve my appearance; however, as my job responsibilities have grown, it has become impossible for me to return to the gym.  As a result, I hardly ever socialize (I detest bars) and my appearance has deteriorated.

I accept my celibacy, but would like to have a relationship similar to those I’ve had before.  My friends and acquaintances continue to bring the subject up, resulting in a continuing string of very awkward situations for me.  My coworkers are always inquiring about my relationships as well.  I’ve found that to be the most difficult aspect of celibacy - defending it to others.